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Autumn, winter, spring or summer ... Any time of the year is good for teach children to create their little goals to improve themselves every day. Mini achievements that will make you happier and become a great person. And a process that also, as parents, we can learn to improve ourselves.
To achieve a goal it is necessary to direct actions for a specific purpose, that is, action must be taken. If a person wants to run a marathon, he must prepare and be disciplined in his training; if a person wants to be a journalist, they must train in it and practice their communication skills; And if a boy or girl wants to learn to ride a bike, they will have to practice and work, with the help of their referents, their fears of falling.
Well, this is all related to goals. In the world of emotional intelligence, goals are considered opportunities for learning and growth, and to know if a goal can be achieved or is within our possibilities, we define the acrostic M.E.T.A. as follows:
- M: it has to be measurable in time.
- E: Specific, capable of being specified, that is, well defined.
- T: Tangible, make it palpable.
- A: Achievable, affordable to my circumstances.
It is clear to me that this breakdown can help us assess our goals, both professional and personal. And in this way, our children will also see our efforts to achieve that desire we want.
But it is inevitable that the routine of the day makes us immerse ourselves in our jobs, tasks, activities, meetings and we pay little attention to giving ourselves the opportunity to do something, no matter how small, that helps us to be better people. Small goals that help us realize that we can and that we want to. Who doesn't want to be a better person? As Robert Baden-Powell said, 'Try to leave this world a little better than you found it.'
And how can we teach this to our sons and daughters? First by example, and also by sharing it with them: 'Honey, do you know what I did at work today? It turns out that there is a new colleague and the truth is that I had never talked much to him, since I am always very busy, but today I invited him to a coffee to get to know him a little more and help him feel more comfortable in the office.
If I, as a mother or father, share what I did at home, the first thing my children will do is realize that I like to tell them what I do in my day to day. They will also see that mom or dad makes efforts to help others, who make time for it. And in the same way we can invite them to make those little gestures too. Also, It is important for them to know that getting better every day takes effort.
To make it operational, we can write on a blackboard, one of those that we all have in a visible place, small goals that we propose to achieve each week and once we carry them out we will share them as a family, from respect and from validation by the effort of the other person. We will also share how we have felt, in this way we are also listening to our interior, thus working once again on self-knowledge.
There is no doubt that, little by little, our sons and daughters will be able to set small goals for themselves and that these shared achievements will make them grow. They will see their power to do and grow, thus increasing their self-esteem and becoming aware of their feelings.
I give you concrete examples that we can say to our children, although it is also important that it comes out of themselves:
- Many times our children refuse to try any food, because of the smell or the appearance, because this is the time to work on it. Then they will decide if they like it or not, but have them try it. So for the good, it is likely that they will not do it, magic wands do not exist, but doing the previous work that I have commented before, it will be easier.
- Play with a partner who may be a little lonely at recess or in the yard. You can propose it and do it for a few days, surely it is not like the rest of your friends or friends, but you can learn things from him or her. Then you will share it at home.
- Be more attentive or attentive to how I leave the room and try to make it more orderly. Realize the satisfaction you feel when it is collected.
Also moms and dads, we can set small goals for each day:
- Today I will not screamBefore I take a deep breath to calm myself.
- I will play more time with my children, despite the fatigue of work and household chores that are always pending.
- I will respect more the times of my children, being forward-looking or anticipatory of their desire to play or their rhythm at meals, for example.
The goal of this life is to be happy, and that depends on each one of us. Don't doubt that these little gestures help.
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